Ever had somebody offer you unhealthy information? How about excellent news? What is the distinction or is there a distinction?
Excellent news – stuff or data that makes us blissful, content material, reassured, safe and validated.
Unhealthy information – the other.
So, it could seem that there’s a distinction between good and unhealthy information – learn on.
Have you ever ever gotten unhealthy information however ultimately issues turned out properly or higher than you anticipated? Have you ever ever acquired excellent news and over time what you thought was excellent news ended up being not so good?
From private expertise I can inform you that I’ve skilled all 4 –
Excellent news that was good.
Unhealthy information that was unhealthy.
Excellent news that I believed was good however ended up being unhealthy.
Unhealthy information that I believed was unhealthy and ended up being good.
Confused but? Effectively I do know that over time I used to be typically confused in regards to the distinction between these two obvious reverse messages. However then I discovered that typically unhealthy information for one individual might be perceived as excellent news for another person and that excellent news to 1 individual over time might be perceived as unhealthy.
Confused? Let me clarify.
Ultimately it is simply information and what makes it unhealthy or good and even impartial isn’t the information itself however how we understand it, decide it, consider it or react due to it.
How can somebody understand unhealthy information pretty much as good you may ask? Or the other, how may somebody understand excellent news as unhealthy?
Briefly – every of us has a novel historical past, experiences, beliefs and values and consequently none of us ever see the identical factor or circumstance in the identical means.
Somebody who’s a worrier, detrimental, pessimistic or impatient may see a delay as unhealthy when one other one that understands the idea of there are issues we are able to management and there are issues we won’t management so why get all upset about one thing you possibly can‘t management or for those who can management it get busy.
Ultimately all the pieces that occurs – simply occurs and what we do is interpret all of it based mostly on our expectations, objectives, wants or mindsets and all of those are distinctive for every of us.
Let me offer you a few private examples. And if you’ll contemplate the reason although it’s possible you’ll not have had precisely the identical circumstances, if you’ll give it some thought I will be you possibly can relate.
Previous to staring my talking and coaching profession I used to be a nationwide gross sales supervisor for a global group. Lengthy story however the quick aspect is I had a problem with my boss, the president and consequently he fired me. Unhealthy information, proper? Effectively that was all I wanted to determine it was time to start a profession that has lasted over 40 years and has allowed me to see the world (25 international locations up to now) and work with some super shoppers and audiences. So ultimately this unhealthy information was actually excellent news.
This is one other fast one.
Years in the past I proposed to my spouse and he or she mentioned sure. Excellent news proper? (No judgments right here please). Effectively over time after doing my greatest for greater than fifteen years I made a decision that it was time to finish it and why? Effectively, with out the grotesque particulars, the connection was steadily eroding my vanity, confidence and optimistic mindset and I made a decision that I did not like who I used to be turning into in that relationship. We parted, amicably – however we parted. Excellent news as I used to be ready – over time – to regain all I had misplaced – emotionally and spiritually.
All of us have our tales and all of us can create lists of fine information and unhealthy information we have now acquired however ultimately it is all simply information.
Throughout a few of my company packages I share this straightforward idea – cease asking your staff for excellent news or unhealthy information – simply ask them for the information and then you definately determine which it’s. As a result of their definition might be fully totally different than yours.
And vice versa – as an govt or supervisor do not broadcast – I’ve some good or unhealthy information – simply inform your staff you have received some information and let every of them interpret it as they see match based mostly on their private viewpoints, attitudes, mindsets, expertise, expectations and the way it may affect them personally.
I need to make it clear right here that I am not speaking about denial, give up, acceptance or apathy – simply the willingness to see that there could also be one other aspect of the story, one it’s possible you’ll be lacking due to your historical past, viewpoints, opinions, judgments and so forth.